Funny Shayari Collection

Aise apni Wife ho
5'4" jiski height ho,
Jeans jiski tight ho, Chehara jiska bright ho,
Weight mein thodi light Ho, Umar me difference slight ho,
Thodi see wo quiet ho, Aise apni Wife ho.

Sadak per sab kahe kya cute ho,
Bheed me sab kahe side ho, side ho,
India ki paidaish ho,
Saas ki seva jiski khwahish ho Aisi apni Wife ho.
Padosi jab baat kare to haath me knife ho,
Dinner candle light ho, Dono me na kabhi fight ho,
Milne ke baad dil delight ho, Yeh poem padhke sab kahe
"Guru,tum right ho",

Aise apni Wife ho.
Kaash yeh concept 0.0001 percent bhi right ho
Agar aisi apni wife ho to kya hasin life ho
Har kisi ki yahi farmaish ho Kudrat ki bhi aajmaish ho
Khudah ke software mein bhi bug ki na gunjaish hoo
...aisi apni wife hoo......aisi apni wife hoo... ...aisi apni wife hoo...


Jiski samajdaar hai wife
Samjho uski settle hai life
Har kaam hoti hai right
Kaali zindagi bhi ban jaati hai white
Kahin naam hoti nahi hai black
Wo chuwa deti hai smack
Kisi bhi baat mein hota nahi hai not
Garmi ka din bhi lagta nahi hai hot
Itni achchai se wo karti har work
Khane ke samay bhi uthana nahi padega fork
Ghar mein zhagda ka khin hota nahi name
Aapke parivar ke sadyasa jaisi ban jaati hai same
Ghar ko ye achchi tarak karti hai handle
Parivar ke har aadmi ko bana deti hai gentle
Apne saas sasur ki karti hai respect
Har baat ko wo hans kar karti hai react
Aisi hoti hai ek samajdaar wife
Jo bana eti hai ek best life


Masoom mohabbat ka bas itna sa fasaana hai
Kaagaz ki haveli hai
Kya shart-e-mohabat hai
Kya shart-e-zamana hai
Awaz bhi zakhmi hai aur geet bhi gaana hai
Kashti bhi puraani hai
Toofaan ko bhi aana hai
Samjhe ya na samjhe vo yeh andaaz mohabbat ke
Ek shakhs ko aankhon se ek sher sunaana hai
Bholi si adaa koi fir ishq ki zidd par hai
Fir aag ka dariya hai aur phir doob ke jaana hai....


Woh kahate hai hum se ke
Aapka Message Churaya huwa hota hai..
Woh kahate hai hum se ke
aapka message churaya huwa hota hai..
Yu to net par SMS ka khazana hota hai..
Kuchch to kadar kar lo Zalim(Tum)..
Aakhir selection to Hamara Hota hai.....


Premika:- Tum to bass apne kaam mai lage rehte hoo
meri to koi parwah hi nahi hai tumhe!
premi:- Oyee pyar karne wale kisiki parwah nahi karte........


Haridwar main BABA ka Mela laga hua hain
Prasad main Kambal bate ja rahe hain.
Kisi our ko mat batana ye sms sirf selected
BHIKARIYOKO bheja ja raha hain.


Agar manzil ko pana hai to himat saath rakhna,
Agar pyar ko pana hai to aitbar saath rakhna,
Agar hamesha muskurana ho to BRUSH AUR PASTE SAATH RAKHNA.


Wo gulab hi kya hai jis me laali na ho
Wo gulshan hi kya hai jis me maali na ho
Wo SASURAL hi kya kai jis me SAALI na ho
Arre yaaro wo program hi kya hai jis me Taali na ho


Ek janaje ko dekhkar ladki muskarai,
baba bola jawan maut par yu hasa nahi karte,
Beti boli baba wada kiya tha jab bhi milenge mauskraywnge


ek ladki thi dewani si mobile lekar ghumti thi
shama ke ghabra ke wo kuch karti rahti thi
jabbhi milti thi mujhse hamesa puchti thi ye on kaise hota hai


santa:itna sara log football ko lath kahe mar rahe hai?
banta:gol karne ke liye.
santa:sasura gol hi to hai aur kitna gol karenge


Ladkiyon ke college me strike thi,
Ladke bhi unke saath the Ladkiyon ne naara lagaya:
HUMARI MAANGE Pichhe se awaaz aayi SINDUR SE BHARO


Gulaab ko bhi Kamal bana deter,
Uski ek ada pe kai gazal bana dete...
Kambhakt marti nahi mujh par ladkiyaan,
Warna LUCKNOW me bhi TAJMAHAL bana dete...


Jabh aankh mein nami si hoti hei,
Dil mein kisiki kami si hoti hei,
Jabh aankh jukh jaaye toe nami sukh jaaye,
Par koi bataaye kaise dil ka dukh jaaye...!


aaj bhi karte hain tera hi intezaar,
aankhen ruki,dhadkan ruki,saansen ruki.
ruk gayi ye zindagi. Phir bhi aas karti hai ye karar,
janmon tak karenge tera hi intezaar


teri yaadon ke sahare duniya me rah lete hai..
teri juddai ka gam chupchap sah lete hai..
samjhaya dilko yeh raaz chupana..
par aansu banke wo sab kah dete hai..


jhooti hansi hansne ki aadat ho gayi hai
zindagi teri yaadon ki ibaadat ho gayi hai
bas saans chal rahi hai is murde mein
ab rooh to tere saath hi rukhsat ho gayi hai


Nazar andaz kaise kare aapko,
Nazro me bithaya hai aapko,
Yaad aane par roye bhi to kaise,
Darte hai kahi Jhuki Palke chubh na jaaye aapko..!!!


GAGAN KE TOOTEY TARO KA HAAL KISNE PUCHA HAI,
JANHA MEIN DEEVANO KA HAAL KIS NE PUCHA HAI ,
SABHI NE PHULO KO CHAHA HAI SULAGTI RAKH PE
DEEVANO KA HAAL KIS NE PUCHA HAI


Ek hi tamanna hai is fakir ke paas,
Meri tasvir lagana apni tasvir ke paas...
Taki dekhe to log kahe,
Dekho Raanjha kaise baitha hai apni Heer ke paas...


Yaadon ki dhund me aapki parchai si lagti hai,
Kaano me gunjti shahnai si lagti hai...
Aap karib ho to apnapan hai,
Warna seene me saanse bhi parai si lagti hai....


Dhoond lo koi tumhe mil hi jayega,
magar hamari tarah pyar tumhe kaun kar payega,
mumkin hai chahat ki nazar se koi dekh le tumhe,
aankhen hamari kahan se payega


Rang wale rang se tasveer badal dete hain,
Nikle hue kamaan se teer badal dete hain...
Tumse mere do aansu na badle gaye,
Badalne wale to taqdeer badal dete hain....


Samundar ki ret pe naam kabhi likhte nahi,
Ret pe likhe naam kabhi tik te nahi.
Aap kehte ho ki tum patthar dil hai,
Par patthar pe likhe naam kabhi mit te nahi....

Romantic Sms

Ur words r ANTIBIOTICS,
Ur words r ANTIBIOTICS,
Ur smile is ANALGESIC,
Ur touch is ANTI-INFLAMATORY,
Ur presence is ANTISEPTIC,
Ur SMS is ANTI-PYRETIC...


Do u know whats the meaning of FAMILY?
Do u know whats the meaning of FAMILY?
F=father
A=and
M=mother
I=i
L=love
Y=you


My eyes Miss U, My Feeling Love U,
My eyes Miss U, My Feeling Love U,
My hand Need U, My Mind Call U,
My heart just 4 U. I will Die without U, Bcoz I Love U.


Love is like a bird,
Love is like a bird, if u hold it tightly it dies,
if u hold it slightly , it flies,
plz take good care of it.. DOn't Luv 1,
don't Luv2, but Luv 1 who Luvs u!


What's wrong with your mobile
Hello! What's wrong with your mobile Tried
so many times but it says"The subscriber your are
trying to reach is in your heart"!!



I cant hear u, i cant see u,i cant hold u, romantic sms Shayari
I cant hear u, i cant see u,i cant hold u,but i really do miss u,
Happy Valentines day, my best friend.


Love not one, Love not two Love the one who loves u true,
Love not one, Love not two Love the one who loves u true,
Love not three, Love not four Love the one who loves u more.
Love not five, Love not six Love the one who really sticks,
Love not seven, Love not eight Love the one who really waits


I've got ur back n u've got mine,
I've got ur back n u've got mine,
I'll help u out anytime.
2 see u hurt, 2 see u cry,
Makes me weep n wanna die.
I'll b right here, till the end,
Coz ur my Love& My Best friend



Give "LAUGH" 2 all
Give "LAUGH" 2 all
But "SMILE" 2 1
Give "CHEEKS" 2 all
But "LIPS" 2 1
Give "LOVE" 2 all
But "HEART" 2 1
Let Everybody "LOVE" u
But U "LOVE" 1


Golden Facts of Life:-When someone loves U
Golden Facts of Life:-When someone loves U,
U dont realise it...When U realise it,
Its too late,U always love the one who leaves U &
Leave the one who loves U...


The Heart of Love
The -# -.- #-.
Heart # "#" #
of "#. . #"
a Friend "#"
knows No BoundarieS,No LimitS,just endless Love and Care! "Have a Great Day..."


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U are sucsessfully loaded in my heart

Funny Sms Messages Collection

Sardarji, tell me ...., what is the meaning of SMS ?
Sardar angrily said, i know - it means....
S - Sardaron ke
M - Mazak udane ki
S - Service

World's Smallest resignation letter?
Respected sir,
I luv ur wife.

Santa: I kiss my wife everyday before leaving for office, what about u?
Banta: Me too, after u leave

When i open my eyes every morning i pray to God
that everyone should have a friend like you.... Why should only i suffer!!!

Love is like a bowl of oatmeal; warm, mushy and good for you.
Lust is like soup, it is only good when it is hot. =)

Dying husband: I have something to tell you.
Wife: Don't speak, just rest. Husband:
No, I must confess, I had sex with your sister and your best friend.
Wife: Sshhh. I know! That's why I poisoned you!

What is the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After one year, the dog is still excited to see you. =)

One day you will ask me what is more important 2 me,
you or my life?
I will say my life & you will leave me without realising that you are my life

What is a difference between a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey?
A kiss is so dear, a car is too dear and a monkey is U dear.

Difference: It's funny when people discuss LOVE MARRIAGE Vs ARRANGED.
It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered

God picked up a flower n dipped it in dew,he lovingly touched it,
& it turned into u.And then he gifted it to me n said this friend is 4 u

Latest Cool Definitions

Divorce :

Future tense of marriage.


Cigarette :

A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool on the other.


Lecture :

An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either"


Conference :

The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.


Compromise :

The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.


Tears :

The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water power...


Dictionary :

A place where success comes before work.


Conference Room :

A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.


Classic :

A book which people praise, but do not read.


Smile :

A curve that can set a lot of things straight.


Office :

A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.


Yawn :

The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Etc. :
A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.


Committee :

Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.


Experience :

The name men give to their mistakes.


Atom Bomb :

An invention to end all inventions.


Philosopher :

A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.


Diplomat :

A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.


Opportunist :

A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.


Optimist :

A person who while falling from Eiffel tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."


Miser :

A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.


Father :

A banker provided by nature.


Criminal :

A guy no different from the rest....except that he got caught.


Boss :

Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.


Politician :

One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.


Doctor :

A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.

Students Exams SMS

An engineering student to his sweeper brother:
"mere paas degree hai, knowledge hai,
4 logon mein baithne ki izzat hai. Tere paas kya hai?".
Sweeper: Mere paas naukri hai


A father asks peon: How are the studies in this college?
Where do I see my son in future?
Peon: The future is bright,
I had also completed my engineering from the same college!


Harbhajan starts raising his bat on 33 runs.
Dravid: What happened, its not 50 or 100!
Harbhajan: Yes, but the students understand the importance of scoring 33.


My nights are going sleepless, my days are going useless.
So I asked GOD, "is this love?". GOD replied, "no dear, result is near".


To be a "Good professional",
always start to study late for "Exams".
Because it teaches how to manage
"Time" and tackle "Emergencies"!!


Human brain is the most outstanding object in world.
It functions 24hrs a day, 365days a year.
It functions right from the time we are born,
and stop only when we enter the examination hall.


Burraaah......
Sara syllabus padh liya...
Bas books aur notes padhne reh gaye hain...


Har Sawal Se Dat Kar Ladna,
Fekne Me Kami Mat Karna,
Mouka Mila To Peche Bhi Dekhna,
Aur Ek Baath Yaad Rakhna,
Aage Wala Ka Paper Apna Samajhna


Class ki har ladki ek phool hai,
Usse chahna ek bhool hai.
Jo inki soch mein gul hai,
Samjho uski Compartment ke chances full hai.

Rakhi SMS

Sister is someone who is caring and sharing.
Sister can understand things you never said.
She can understand pain which is not visible to anyone.
I love my sister


HOLI IS COLORFUL,
DIWALI IS LIGHTFUL AND BRIGHTFUL,
RAKHI HAS MADE OUR RELATIONSHIP POWERFUL.


I long for the day through the year
that you so ceremoniously tie rakhi on my wrist and
pray for my well being. Dear Sis,
I wish that our bond grows stronger everyday.


"Sisters share the scent and smells...
the feel of a common childhood."


"Sisters is probably the most
competitive relationship within the family,
but once sisters are grown,
it becomes the strongest relationship."


Our siblings. They resemble us just enough
to make all their differences confusing,
and no matter what we choose to make of this,
we are cast in relation to them our whole lives long.

The good deed you do today For a brother or sister
in need Will come back to you some day
For humanity's a circle in deed.


Those are the same stars,
and that is the same moon,
that look down upon your brothers and sisters,
and which they see as they look up to them,
though they are ever so far away from us, and each other

Mother's Day SMS

M - For the MILLION things she gave me,
O - For she’s growing OLD,
T - For the TEARS she shed to save me,
H - For her HEART of purest gold,
E - For her EYES, with love-light shining,
R - For she is always RIGHT and always be.


You've seen me laugh
You've seen me cry
And always you were there with me
I may not have always said it
But thanks and I love you
Happy Mother's Day


For the best mom
who always had a smile for me
I know we may be far apart right now
So here's a great big hug and kiss
Happy Mother's Day


Many hugs
Only luv never anger
Teaching me
Helping me
Every smile when I was sad
Raising me to be strong
It spells Mother. Thanks for being u.



Happy Mother's Day
means more than flowers and gifts
It means saying thank you
It means I love you
You are my mother, my friend
Today is your day!



I luv u mom
having u makes me feel safe & calm
I miss u mom
Missing touches 2 my face with ur chapped palm
u r the greatest
because u r my mom


A mother serves her sugar with
A bit of peppermint
To clarify the passages
That carry what she meant
When she first set to bear a soul
Quite separate from her own,
Whom she would cherish, yet must teach
To live and die alone.



Make for me a place within your heart
On which I can depend. For only you
Touch the ancient wellsprings of my tears,
Home through all the wanderings of my years,
Eden that no other can renew,
Root I cannot rend through rage or art.


Being a great mother is a very hard role,
but mother u r the star for this one I know,
I love you Mom. Happy Mothers Day


Thanku mother for all that u do,
i know my thanks are far to few,
I really do love u i dont say enough,
4 me those words r really tough,
i wish i could express all that i feel,
bt 4 me u know thats a big deal,
Have a g8 day i m thinking of u ,
i hope my feelings r getting through.
Happy Mothers Day